November 10, 2004

I figure the easiest way for me to do this was to just title the posts with the date. Unless there is something special I want to write about, that will be how I do it.

Last night I slept like crap. I must have woken up about 20 times and I froze my butt off cause Mike kept stealing all the covers! This morning I'm tired, cranky, and PMSing. I have a lot of stuff going on right now. I have to figure out what I need to do to finalize my Real Estate License test date, I need to actually STUDY for it which is incredibly boring, and I need to figure out what it is I really want to do. Yes I know, I'm getting my real estate license so why don't I use it? Cause Im not sure if I wanted to get into that field cause my parents are in it or cause I really really did like it when I was involved in it.

I want to try child care too. I dont know if it is feasible since I still live in an apartment, but it is a pretty decent size. I just love children, I have always loved babysitting, so I figure I would like to do child care for a living. The only problem is getting motivated enough to check it out and find out if I should try it or not.

I guess the biggest thing bugging me right now is Mike. Im totally crazy mad in love with him, cant picture my life without and we plan on being together forever, but he has yet to propose. I am soooo ready to get married to him and last Christmas he gave me a promise ring. He said the promise was that sometime after I graduated school, we would get engaged. Well, I graduated back in September. I know, I know. It has only been 2 months, but darn it I am impatient! February will be 3 years. I don't want to end up like one of those people who are "dating" for 15 years and never get married. I know it is an unreasonable thought but it is there.

I also want to have children. But I refuse to have children before I have a ring on my finger! That makes it even more difficult because I just found out the other day he is now ready for children too. I told him I wanted a ring first. There are very vital steps that I am not going to skip here. It is just so frustrating cause I want it all now, not later. I guess I will just have to continue to be "patient". After all, I don't want to push him and keep mentioning it because the last thing I want is to make him feel like he is being forced into anything.